Saturday, July 26, 2008

NOT for the squeamish!! (Seriously, you have been warned!)

At the express request of frogprincess, may I present to you a category winner from Cannes 2001 - Staplerfahrer Klaus - Der Erste Arbeitstag. Or, if your German is as good as mine - Forklift Driver Klaus - The First Day On The Job.

I have a couple of private copies (with English subtitles) of this because FLT operator training is 90% of what my company does, and I find it funny as hell [goneforeign? You most definitely WON'T!] Unbelievably you can buy a public-license version and use it as a training accompaniment video. I would never do that (a) because that version ups the cost by 10,000% for the same tape, and (b) ... well, watch for yourself . . . you just wouldn't would you? Enjoy:
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And before you dismiss this as being outlandish for the sake of it, you should know that in the UK we STILL average twenty to thirty fatal accidents involving FLTs every single year!

Erm, lecture over. If you enjoyed that, head over to youtube and type in Friseuse Claudia or Elektriker Horst.

Now let's see if I've successfully embedded a youtube ...

13 comments:

steenbeck said...

You have successfully embedded a youTube and I can't stop laughing. Reminded me of this...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iw_65JJYKcY

DarceysDad said...

Yep, I remember that one sb.

In fact, the strapline quote from Cinema Magazine (Germany) said about Klaus -

"Perkekter Genremix aus Slapstick und Splatter. Festivalknüller. Kultstatus."

but that could apply to the Python/Peckinpah just as well.

goneforeign said...

DD: Well regardless of your caution I did proceed, I could hardly pass up the Grand Prize at Cannes could I? It reminds me of a mate back in the 70's who had a job just like Klaus, he used to tell me tales of how they would 'play' bullfighting in the warehouse with two FLT's, charging each other with the 'horns' up at body height.
He's the dean of a dept at a college now.

alimunday said...

DsD - I am convinced, I will never drive a FLT. Anywhere.

FP said...

Excellent - thanks for posting it. Very surprising that it won a prize in Cannes. It's not at all the typical kind of short film that goes down well there. I think it's strength, apart from the brilliant pastiche of a training movie, the splatter slapstick and very black humour, is the fact that is CAN be understood by an international audience without the dialogue. I have a theory that the best films tell their stories through image rather than through dialogue anyway. Certainly the case here. And the German film funds certainly got the joke in advance - it was financed by three major funds: Hamburg, Schlesweig-Holstein and Niedersachsen. So the synopsis and script had everyone convinced from the start. A real classic. Dankeschön!

glasshalfempty said...

DsD, if your business is 90% FLT training, I guess you are bit exposed to the recession (hence the gap in your order book, for which mucho commiserations). No doubt you are trying to diversify. White collar H&S might be a good balance. How about offering to train financial services personnel in how to avoid impaling themselves on complex mortgage-backed derivatives?

Shoegazer said...

Would have thought this would be a perfect "ice-breaker" for an FLT training session - as long as no p.c. woossies from HR are hanging around. But then again, they usually are these days.

Shoegazer said...

Erm, I think that should be wussies.

ejaydee said...

"the brilliant pastiche of a training movie"... Oh. I actually thought this was real. Now I know what it must have felt like to believe Spinal Tap was a real band.

Mnemonic said...

ejaydee, you are not alone. I thought it was real too.

FP said...

.. we all do until the moment when the stanley knife hits the bloke's head and he calmly pulls it our before tottering away. Then and only then do you start thinking "whaaaaaa???"

DarceysDad said...

EX-ACT-LY right fp!

My history with this is that I was pottering through the teletext pages one night looking for the start/finish times for a programme I wanted to videotape.

In the way that relevant words do, sometimes, 'Ch4: 4.10am - Forklift Klaus' leapt off the screen at me. "What's that?" I thought. Well it didn't interfere with the programme I was recording and there was space on the tape, so I set it.

The next morning I was in the house on my own with an infant DsSis still stacking Zeds, so I got a coffee, sat down and pressed play. My recording missed any announcement at the beginning, so I was totally unprepared for what followed. At 3 minutes in I was thinking "Why is a German training video on Channel4, even if it is four in the morning? I've never seen 7DeadlySins or Dangerous Manoeuvres on the telly!" Then he snapped that blade just as I put my coffee mug to my lips . . . 5 minutes later the film finished and I've got a near empty mug just under my open mouth and coffee stains down my Counting Crows tour T-shirt!

I have to say that Channel4 were very helpful and gave me the contact details for the production company, and a mere €18 later, two copies of the English sub-title version had been mailed to me first class from Germany.

I'm not normally a splatter fan, but I do think this is quite simply the best pastiche of a training film I've ever seen.

Thanks everyone, and
by the way, I passed my annual inspection from my accrediting body today, so I'm in a much better mood!

Cheers.

Marconius7 said...

Funnier than Lupo the Butcher!