Tuesday, May 13, 2008

I chickened out, it was just too much

I couldn't find a good title or caption for this brilliant picture featured on GU today, and I think it deserves a proper one. 
So please post your entries and I'll randomly select my favourite.



Right, I think I'll close the entry for the competition, but feel free to post your childish witticisms ad infinitum.

I think I'll have to do this in categories because they're all so good:

⎈Tabloid Genius: "Rock Mock Cock Shocks Flock"

⎈Team America silly accent Award
The Central Committee celebrates "Election Day"....

⎈Best International Relations reference-Tied: 
"Taipei's gift to Beijing of "the world's biggest karaoke microphone" causes some wringing of hands."
"CIA dossier reveals new North Korean WMD threat- proposes $11bn chastity belt shield in the Aleutians "

⎈Best 'Spill reference: You should see the size of the dondle mitt.

⎈Classiest New Yorker Caption, though potentially rude if you have a dirty enough mind: The delivery of the new monumental fountain to the Jade Dragon restaurant caused Mr Weng unexpected consternation...

And, the most reliable category from you lot: 
⎈Most Graphic Sex Reference-Tied:

"Who's been fiddling with the Terracotta Warrior"

You can close your mouth, honey, you'll never fit that in there.

The woman at the back of the queue is silently wishing:
"Oh pleasedontcometilitsmyturn, pleasedontcometilitsmyturn, pleasedontcometilitsmyturn, pleasedontcometilitsmyturn..."

The operation had been successful, and he was pleased with his increased size, but now--where to fit it? Auditions weren't going well.

42 comments:

Blimpy said...

"Local Man bemused by erection of Leaning Tower of Geezer"

CaroleBristol said...

Crowds in Tokyo flock to new X-rated Godzilla exhibition.

Blimpy said...

"Rock Mock Cock Shocks Flock"

glasshalfempty said...

Shortage of tiger penis forces Chinese doctors to consider new sources of aphrodisiac

nilpferd said...

Chinese industry presents new, unextinguishable torch design to IOC officials.

Blimpy said...

Mr Chan's tombola prizes grew even more outlandish with every passing year. Still, it was all money towards a new roof for the orphanage.

saneshane said...

"Who's been fiddling with the Terracotta Warrior"

FP said...

The delivery of the new monumental fountain to the Jade Dragon restaurant caused Mr Weng unexpected consternation...

ejaydee said...

Heehee, they're all brilliant, thanks everyone keep them coming!

DarceysDad said...

Taipei's gift to Beijing of "the world's biggest karaoke microphone" causes some wringing of hands.

Blimpy said...

Ding: "Dong!"

(i think the PC police are going to cart ol' Blimpy away after that one....)

Blimpy said...

Wang: "Dang!"

(i'll get me coat.....)

TonNL said...

The Central Committee celebrates "Election Day"....

steenbeck said...

He'd had a few misgivings when he replied to the "Are you the next man to be supersized in the pants" e-mail.

or

You should see the size of the dondle mitt.

Or

You can close your mouth, honey, you'll never fit that in there.

ejaydee said...

They're too good! I'm spoilt for choice now, I laughed out loud at most of them.

nilpferd said...

"Cheneyfurters XXL" Korean launch in attempt to penetrate lucrative noodle market

nilpferd said...

CIA dossier reveals new North Korean WMD threat- proposes $11bn chastity belt shield in the Aleutians

DarceysDad said...

The woman at the back of the queue is silently wishing:

"Oh pleasedontcometilitsmyturn,pleasedontcometilitsmyturn, pleasedontcometilitsmyturn,pleasedontcometilitsmyturn..."

Ahem, sorry for that!

snadfrod said...

"Snadfrod goes East."






(Someone had to...)

glasshalfempty said...

At the new Plastercaster Museum in Beijing, the Chinese public gets its first exposure to Jimi Hendrix

(TonNL must get the prize, tho')

FP said...

No!!! Nooooooo! I ordered a stone replica of the great DENG !!!!

steenbeck said...

The operation had been successful, and he was pleased with his increased size, but now--where to fit it? Auditions weren't going well.

goneforeign said...

"Yeah' it was in the papers yesterday, "The Lakers have signed him"

ToffeeBoy said...

Oh my God, it's Axl Rose!




(with apologies to nilpferd (see tonnl's thread on Beatiful People, below...)

ShivSidecar said...

"I'm buggered if I'm carrying the Olympic flame through Beijing on that..."

ShivSidecar said...

"Frankly Mr Sidecar, we were expecting something a little more discreet".

ShivSidecar said...

"I thought you said we were going to meet a big lad from Nanking!" [Puerile and unfunny - it takes a rare gift. -Ed.]

Blimpy said...

Hong Kong's Annual One Eye Staring Competition gets off to a flying start.

Blimpy said...

The chap on the right is thinking "I hope this isn't like the Blarney Stone...."

ShivSidecar said...

"You're welcome to enter China, Miss Wray - but we insist you leave your pets at the border".

treefrogdemon said...

New Olympic category added

FP said...

Cheers for the New Yorker gong Frenchy! Very Carrie Bradshaw.

saneshane said...

"the new water feature was causing the daytime gardening schedulers some consternation."

hey great awards
("none of us would have made it this far without the casting couch...the tears, the pain, the suffering are all now worthwhile!!!)

DarceysDad said...

Holy rent sphincters, Batshane! If we'd met THAT on the casting couch, there would indeed have been pain, suffering, and BOTH meanings of tears!

saneshane said...

My stunt double is bugg.... I tell you!

DarceysDad said...

Hmmm, I don't think I like where this innuendo is heading: I shall withdraw before I get even further behi ... D'OH!!

;o)

.

steenbeck said...

Oh, dear, I got 2 in the most graphic category.

Does anyone else find it funny that the 'Spillains have been pondering a giant phallus for a few days?

ejaydee said...

I'm quite proud of this achievement.

DarceysDad said...

"...giant..." ?? Really???

Blimpy said...

brill stuff all round ejaydee - same time next week?

ejaydee said...

Well it all depends on the picture. This one is just classic, you don't come along these beauties everyday.

Blimpy said...

The penis is thinking: "What a cock..."