So please post your entries and I'll randomly select my favourite.
Right, I think I'll close the entry for the competition, but feel free to post your childish witticisms ad infinitum.
I think I'll have to do this in categories because they're all so good:
⎈Tabloid Genius: "Rock Mock Cock Shocks Flock"
⎈Team America silly accent Award:
The Central Committee celebrates "Election Day"....
⎈Best International Relations reference-Tied:
⎈Best International Relations reference-Tied:
"Taipei's gift to Beijing of "the world's biggest karaoke microphone" causes some wringing of hands."
"CIA dossier reveals new North Korean WMD threat- proposes $11bn chastity belt shield in the Aleutians "
⎈Best 'Spill reference: You should see the size of the dondle mitt.
⎈Classiest New Yorker Caption, though potentially rude if you have a dirty enough mind: The delivery of the new monumental fountain to the Jade Dragon restaurant caused Mr Weng unexpected consternation...
And, the most reliable category from you lot:
"CIA dossier reveals new North Korean WMD threat- proposes $11bn chastity belt shield in the Aleutians "
⎈Best 'Spill reference: You should see the size of the dondle mitt.
⎈Classiest New Yorker Caption, though potentially rude if you have a dirty enough mind: The delivery of the new monumental fountain to the Jade Dragon restaurant caused Mr Weng unexpected consternation...
And, the most reliable category from you lot:
⎈Most Graphic Sex Reference-Tied:
"Who's been fiddling with the Terracotta Warrior"
You can close your mouth, honey, you'll never fit that in there.
The woman at the back of the queue is silently wishing:
"Oh pleasedontcometilitsmyturn, pleasedontcometilitsmyturn, pleasedontcometilitsmyturn, pleasedontcometilitsmyturn..."
The operation had been successful, and he was pleased with his increased size, but now--where to fit it? Auditions weren't going well.
"Who's been fiddling with the Terracotta Warrior"
You can close your mouth, honey, you'll never fit that in there.
The woman at the back of the queue is silently wishing:
"Oh pleasedontcometilitsmyturn, pleasedontcometilitsmyturn, pleasedontcometilitsmyturn, pleasedontcometilitsmyturn..."
The operation had been successful, and he was pleased with his increased size, but now--where to fit it? Auditions weren't going well.
42 comments:
"Local Man bemused by erection of Leaning Tower of Geezer"
Crowds in Tokyo flock to new X-rated Godzilla exhibition.
"Rock Mock Cock Shocks Flock"
Shortage of tiger penis forces Chinese doctors to consider new sources of aphrodisiac
Chinese industry presents new, unextinguishable torch design to IOC officials.
Mr Chan's tombola prizes grew even more outlandish with every passing year. Still, it was all money towards a new roof for the orphanage.
"Who's been fiddling with the Terracotta Warrior"
The delivery of the new monumental fountain to the Jade Dragon restaurant caused Mr Weng unexpected consternation...
Heehee, they're all brilliant, thanks everyone keep them coming!
Taipei's gift to Beijing of "the world's biggest karaoke microphone" causes some wringing of hands.
Ding: "Dong!"
(i think the PC police are going to cart ol' Blimpy away after that one....)
Wang: "Dang!"
(i'll get me coat.....)
The Central Committee celebrates "Election Day"....
He'd had a few misgivings when he replied to the "Are you the next man to be supersized in the pants" e-mail.
or
You should see the size of the dondle mitt.
Or
You can close your mouth, honey, you'll never fit that in there.
They're too good! I'm spoilt for choice now, I laughed out loud at most of them.
"Cheneyfurters XXL" Korean launch in attempt to penetrate lucrative noodle market
CIA dossier reveals new North Korean WMD threat- proposes $11bn chastity belt shield in the Aleutians
The woman at the back of the queue is silently wishing:
"Oh pleasedontcometilitsmyturn,pleasedontcometilitsmyturn, pleasedontcometilitsmyturn,pleasedontcometilitsmyturn..."
Ahem, sorry for that!
"Snadfrod goes East."
(Someone had to...)
At the new Plastercaster Museum in Beijing, the Chinese public gets its first exposure to Jimi Hendrix
(TonNL must get the prize, tho')
No!!! Nooooooo! I ordered a stone replica of the great DENG !!!!
The operation had been successful, and he was pleased with his increased size, but now--where to fit it? Auditions weren't going well.
"Yeah' it was in the papers yesterday, "The Lakers have signed him"
Oh my God, it's Axl Rose!
(with apologies to nilpferd (see tonnl's thread on Beatiful People, below...)
"I'm buggered if I'm carrying the Olympic flame through Beijing on that..."
"Frankly Mr Sidecar, we were expecting something a little more discreet".
"I thought you said we were going to meet a big lad from Nanking!" [Puerile and unfunny - it takes a rare gift. -Ed.]
Hong Kong's Annual One Eye Staring Competition gets off to a flying start.
The chap on the right is thinking "I hope this isn't like the Blarney Stone...."
"You're welcome to enter China, Miss Wray - but we insist you leave your pets at the border".
New Olympic category added
Cheers for the New Yorker gong Frenchy! Very Carrie Bradshaw.
"the new water feature was causing the daytime gardening schedulers some consternation."
hey great awards
("none of us would have made it this far without the casting couch...the tears, the pain, the suffering are all now worthwhile!!!)
Holy rent sphincters, Batshane! If we'd met THAT on the casting couch, there would indeed have been pain, suffering, and BOTH meanings of tears!
My stunt double is bugg.... I tell you!
Hmmm, I don't think I like where this innuendo is heading: I shall withdraw before I get even further behi ... D'OH!!
;o)
.
Oh, dear, I got 2 in the most graphic category.
Does anyone else find it funny that the 'Spillains have been pondering a giant phallus for a few days?
I'm quite proud of this achievement.
"...giant..." ?? Really???
brill stuff all round ejaydee - same time next week?
Well it all depends on the picture. This one is just classic, you don't come along these beauties everyday.
The penis is thinking: "What a cock..."
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